As many in the adoption world know you hurry and get stuff done, just so you can wait, this happens over and over in the process. You would think a person would just get used to this cycle and deal with it, but it is oh so hard. Each wait is different, some are longer, some are for just a piece of paper, but they are all hard. The wait for a court date is no exception. I am currently driving myself crazy with all the possibilities. I am hoping getting my feeling out of my head will help, sharing them with my adoption buddies that have gone through this, are going through this, or will be going through it.
It used to be expected that you would travel in about two or three months after referral, you usually received your court date shortly after referral and it was about six to eight weeks after referral. The popularity of the program, plus a judge’s maternity leave have changed this part of the process. Of course, anyone who is or has adopted internationally would tell you just to expect and accept change. The problem is change isn’t always easy to accept. The court dates are currently being scheduled anywhere from three months to about four and half months after referral, most people are learning their court dates about a month after referral. If current trends stay the same that puts us with a court date at the end of May beginning of June, which for the most part doesn’t bother me, I can wait to June to meet my boys. The thing I am struggling with is court isn’t always passed the first time and I am afraid that would put a second court date dangerously close to rainy season (for those of you not familiar with Ethiopian adoption, the courts close end of July/beginning of August to sometime around October for the big rains). I don’t like the thought of cutting it so close. It really scares me.
Okay now for those of you thinking I am just a pessimist and need to be optimistic, I have lots of optimistic thoughts too. (I really am driving myself crazy.) The rumors started last week that the judge on maternity leave was back! This got me thinking and dreaming of meeting my boys even sooner. Would court dates start being scheduled faster and passing sooner? What does that mean for us? What does that mean for the families who already have court dates? Would it expected time of travel be closer to the original two to three months instead of four or sometimes five?
I think my nerves and thoughts would calm down considerably if we just found out our date. I think I would be more patient. I feel guilty for being so impatient during this stage of the process, after all, I get to stare at my sweet babies faces whenever I want. I might not get to hold them, but I know they are being well cared for, just knowing who they are really is amazing.
In the meantime, I love seeing others’ waits finally coming to an end. Two families from our agency passed court last week both on their second tries. I have followed both of their stories from the beginning or very near the beginning. Congratulations to Misty and Dan, and Rachel and Sean (twin baby boys!!!)!